This post was written a couple weeks ago & I had thought it too personal to share, on consideration perhaps it will help some people out there, so here it is.......
Most days my job is wonderful, until some days it just isn't. A few weeks ago from just one of my classes, four of my yogis had fallen at home and been injured, some badly enough to break bones & need to recover at home for several weeks. Others have had serious surgeries & are making their recoveries, at a slower pace as we heal more gradually as we age.
Within a four week period another five of my lovely yogis passed away. I don't always know to miss them in this way as many leave CT for warmer climates during the bitterly cold winters we experience here & who can blame them. This time though it was noticeable as several of the regular friendly faces were missing.
A comment from one of my ladies at the end of the class that day "we are at a fragile time of life" I have been thinking about this & what it really means & how can I possibly help more or in a different way, to make our time in class more meaningful? There are no easy answers.
I considered, what does feeling fragile mean to me? What does feeling fragile mean to you?
Fragile - Adjective (of an object) easily broken or damaged.
Flimsy or insubstantial, easily destroyed
(Of a person) not strong or sturdy, delicate & vulnerable
The meaning of the word fragile is quite telling, it's not a way any of us really want to feel..
I wondered about this & how would fragile feel to me? This morning I got my answer. Today I heard that someone who I had seen several times a week over the past eighteen months had suddenly passed away. Not a person I knew as a friend in the close sense of the word but someone who took classes with me at the gym along with his wife. As a group there were several of us who would chat before & after class, roll our eyes at each other & grimace when the instructor pushed us to go harder & we would smile, laugh & celebrate when class was over.
It's the kind of relationship that although it's not deep, overtime we got to know each other. We're a similar age, one of our sons had hiked regularly with his son, we share similar heartaches such as our sons moving to another state and how hard that can be as a parent. His wife is a lovely lady & together they had worked hard to make considerable changes in their health, joining the gym was part of that change. Gym buddies are considerate, we save each other a spot in class if one of us is running late, we work hard together, celebrate with each other's families joys & now we are contributing to flowers for his family.
So yes, today I feel fragile & I know the depth of how that word can feel. Today I realize more than ever that however strong we try to make ourselves, life it'self is fragile.
So how do we manage? How do we cope? How do I help my yogis? Depending on the day we don't manage, we allow ourselves space to grieve for our friends, fellow yogis & gym buddies, it's ok to not be ok.
Most days, I'm stronger than today and it's easy to see the beauty in the many little things in life & I'm grateful for my opportunities & how fortunate I am to be able to lead such a great group of yogis, they all inspire me in some way.
I realize all over again that we all need to take responsibility for the things in our lives that we can control, eat well & mostly healthily, exercise in a way that is best for our bodies, be compassionate with ourselves & treat our bodies as if they belong to someone we really loved.
Whatever our age, younger or older we have no knowledge or control on how much of our lives will unfold, we can however continue to be kind and compassionate, first to ourselves and then to other human beings and other living creatures and the earth, this part of our lives we can control.
Death is inevitable, we can't change that, however we can change how we live & what our attitude to life is, especially as we age, making the most of those everyday little moments that in the end are the ones that matter most.
"To be present is an act of creation
How you show up to life
No matter how powerful or subtle
Impacts what happens in your world
Just because you are there
How do you choose to show up?
How do you choose to engage in the world?
How do you choose to make a differenc?
How will you help create a world that works?"
Quote from Seale, Alan - Create a world that works - tools for personal & global transformation